Where am I (2016)
Lyon was tired, he was tired of repetition. Travelling to work one day he was not focussing on where he was walking. Engrossed in his phone, Lyon ended up taking the wrong turn. When Lyon eventually looked up he realised he was not in a place he had been before. He walked around a few corners until he could hear the sound of life, to his excitement he found a man on the corner with a wooden cane, leaned up against the wall. Approaching the man slowly, Lyon asked
“Do you know where Arcadia is?”
“Arcadia ?” The man looked puzzled
“Yes Arcadia, sorry I’m lost, I must have taken the wrong turn”
Lyon then started to walk away, accepting that the man was just as lost as he was when he heard from behind him, “If you’re lost, go see the folks across the road in the apartments, they’ll help you”
“Oh thanks, I’ll run over”, Lyon not thinking twice about it, ran across the street to where the man said and opened the front door. Upon opening the wooden door, he saw an old lady sitting behind a reception desk reading a newspaper that had ‘When will it all finish’ on the front cover.
“Excuse me miss, I was just looking for someone, or maybe yourself to tell me how I could get back to Arcadia”
The woman lowered the paper and looked at Lyon with an inviting face and said, “Oh sorry dear, if you’re after directions, you’d be best to go to the next room just through that door there”
“Oh ok, thanks miss”, Lyon now feeling frustrated, walked over to the door and looked back at the lady, “This one?”
“Yes, that’s it. All the best.”
Confused he opened the door and as always, he opened with little focus and in a rush. He opened the door and felt the feeling you get when you are at the peak of a roller coaster and are about to plunge metres upon metres downwards. Upon his first step, he felt a hand on his back, which seemed to increase in pressure, “Ok, there you go”. Those were the last words he heard as he plummited, falling down what felt like a cliff and eventually blacking out. Lyon woke up suspended, floating in a black space. Confused, he thought he was dreaming and continued to pinch himself in hopes of waking up but it was not working.
“Where am I, someone help me? this can’t be real”.
He turned around slowly with caution as he felt as though moving quickly would upset his balance. There was someone else in the distant, “HEY, EXCUSE ME, CAN YOU HEAR ME ..? HEY .. ”.
The person in the distant moved closer, became clearer and eventually was only metres away.
“What’s going on? Where am I, who are you ?”
“ I am Memrise, I am only a sub conscious thought in the back of your mind. Why do you want me so much”
“Excuse me what? Who are you supposed to be and why do you think that?”
Lyon, looking at ‘Mesrise’ with intrigue. Lyon began thinking she looked familiar. Now comfortable with the strangeness of his dark sourounding and this floating girl in front of him, he then began to realise the girl in front of him was in fact something he created …
The scene quickly changed and Lyon thought it now felt like the first or second day of Spring, early September, roughly twenty or so degrees. Lyon still perplexed but even more so because Memrise was showing symptons of hay fever, but he found that so strange because she wasn’t real, she was a fusion of skin, bones and a heart but not real. Can something man made have hay fever, he thought. Anyways that’s not the point, the point was that Lyon had fallen in love, in love with something he created. She was beauty created by ones and oh’s, so many ones and oh’s.
They sat in a field full of tall grass, the sun was setting like it had been working in retail all day and was just about to cash up. Memrise asked Lyon strangely “why do you need me?”
“What do you mean, I created you”, Lyon answered.
The air suddenly changed in density, becoming slightly thicker as feeling as though his answer wasn’t right. Memrise looked at Lyon in disseray as if that wasn’t the case. “But why would you love me if I was created by you, that makes no sense.” Memrise said. Lyon thought to himself at the time, is it wrong to love something you’ve made, no it’s not. Is it wrong to love perfection ? Is it wrong to live in chase of love. Love is after all created, or is love simply there by default.
He then asked her, “do you love me?”
She replied, “well, I do, but it is because I have to”. The air again changed, this time becoming thin, the sun had set and a strong wind blew from behind them. She began harmonising to the sounds of the wind, and singing words poetically that were foreign to Lyon.
“I’ll never forget your face … but nothing’s set in stone, you’ve dipped me in gold, dipped in gold. You can’t breathe dipped in gold.”
Sitting there amazed, yet saddened by the realisation that something he created to simply love him and share emotion with has somehow realised it isn’t working between the two of them. It was very strange. Before Lyon could even begin to start to reason with Mesrise, she began to fade away, as to the tall grass, the risen moon began to go in reverse and he was now back in the same black space he first woke up in. Lyon laid suspended in the air, almost content as for the final time, the air began to change around him. It became very cold and he began falling swiftly to what seemed to be a black hole in space.
As he reached the hole, he started to see flashes of memories from years ago, to memories from only last week. Now nearing the end of the hole, not knowing what laid on the other side there was a flash, as quick as the flash on a camera. Lyon then woke up in the stair case of the apparentment, dazed and confused with blood dripping from the side of his head.
He regained hia balance and went back to the door in which he came, opened the door and to his surprise, he saw a lady sitting behind a reception desk reading a newspaper, with “It’s finally over” on the front cover. I asked the lady “where am I?”
The lady replied, “before you determine where you are, first know who you are and that should help you in search of your arcadia”.
Lyon stumbling passed her confused as to what she was talking about as he made my way to the exit. Stepping out on to the street, Lyon saw a man holding a cane on the corner. The man shouted to Lyon, “excuse me, do you know who I am?”.
“sorry I am not sure” Lyon replied.
Lyon began to feel uneasy and began running down the street, he kept running until his chest and lungs said no more. Bending down to regain some breath, Lyon upon looking up saw a girl, who seemed familiar but he could not understand she was where from. She approached me and whispered in Lyon’s ear, “how could you forget my face? Take deeper breaths, you can’t breathe when you’re dipped in gold” …